Bozoma Saint John on Living Like Time Is Precious ================================================= We talk about The Urgent Life by Bozoma Saint John. It's about grief, love, and why urgency isn't about rushing, it's about showing up fully. ---------------------------------------- SAM: Hey, this is Sam, and you're listening to 7 Minute Books. Today we're talking about The Urgent Life by Bozoma Saint John, a memoir about grief, love, and learning to live fully when time suddenly feels finite. Sophie, I have to ask, what made you want to bring this one to the table? SOPHIE: Hey there Sam. Honestly, this book hit me in a way I didn't expect. Bozoma Saint John was this powerhouse marketing executive at Pepsi, Apple, and Uber, but the memoir isn't about her career. It's about the moment her husband Peter was diagnosed with colon cancer at thirty-nine, and how that shattered everything she thought she knew about time. It's a book about what happens when the future you assumed you'd have just disappears. SAM: And she doesn't start with her rise, right? She starts right there, in the hospital, with a young daughter at home and a husband who's dying. That's such a bold choice for a memoir. SOPHIE: Exactly. She writes about becoming a caretaker, a researcher, a warrior fighting for every extra day. And then Peter dies, and she's just adrift. She's a single mother trying to hold herself together while the world keeps spinning. SAM: The part that got me was how honest she is about grief not being linear. She says she'd be fine one day and then crying in a grocery store the next. That's so real. SOPHIE: Right. She pushes back hard on the neat five stages of grief. For her it was messy and unpredictable. Some days she could barely get out of bed. And she doesn't pretend she had some profound revelation right away. She was angry, broken, confused. SAM: So where does the title come from? The urgent life. Because at first I thought it meant hustle harder, cram more in, that kind of thing. SOPHIE: Yeah, and that's the trap. She defines urgency completely differently. It's not about rushing. It's about stripping away the non-essential and focusing on what actually matters. It's about saying no to things that drain you and yes to things that fill your soul. SAM: That's the shift, isn't it? After Peter died, she started evaluating every relationship and commitment through this new lens. Does this bring me joy? Does this honor the life I want to live? And if the answer was no, she let it go. SOPHIE: And she says that process was painful at first, but also liberating. She realized she'd been carrying so much weight that wasn't hers. Other people's expectations, obligations she'd never actually chosen. SAM: I actually pushed back on this when I first read it. I thought, okay, easy to say when you're a successful executive. But then she gets into the Uber years, and you see what urgent work actually looks like. SOPHIE: Tell me more about that, because that section is wild. SAM: So she joins Uber as Chief Brand Officer right when the company is in full crisis mode. Culture's toxic, public trust is shattered, everyone's telling her not to take the job. They're saying it'll ruin her reputation. But she sees it as a chance to do work that matters, to bring her values into a place that desperately needs them. SOPHIE: And that's the urgent life in action, right? She's not climbing a ladder anymore. She's asking what her work is for. Who is it serving? What mark does it leave? SAM: Exactly. And she's honest about how exhausting it was. Long hours, difficult conversations, moments of doubt. But also breakthroughs, moments where she could feel the culture starting to shift. SOPHIE: There's this thread through the whole book about faith too. She's deeply spiritual, but her faith isn't the easy kind. She writes about praying in hospital waiting rooms, begging God for miracles that never came. SAM: Yeah, that part hit me. She talks about feeling abandoned and alone, and then also moments where she felt a presence beside her, a strength that wasn't her own. That's a very honest kind of faith. SOPHIE: And she's clear that it's not about believing everything will be okay. It's about believing there's meaning in the struggle. Purpose in the pain. SAM: What I love is how vulnerable she is. She doesn't present herself as this flawless hero of resilience. She admits she snapped at her daughter, retreated from the world, felt guilty about working long hours. She's not pretending. SOPHIE: Right. And she says she learned she didn't have to be perfect to be worthy of love. Vulnerability isn't weakness. It's what makes real connection possible. SAM: Then there's the community piece. She writes about the friends who showed up with food and hugs, the colleagues who gave her space to grieve, even strangers who shared their own stories. She calls those relationships the true currency of life. SOPHIE: And that's such a needed reminder, because grief can be so isolating. She's saying we're not meant to do this alone. Asking for help is wisdom, not weakness. SAM: So if someone's listening and thinking, okay, but how do I actually live this way? What does she say about that? SOPHIE: She's clear it's not a one-time achievement. It's a practice, a discipline. Some days she succeeds, some days she fails. But she keeps showing up. She writes about gratitude, forgiveness, seeking joy even in sorrow, and keeping love at the center. SAM: And the book doesn't end with a tidy bow. She's remarried, career's still going, but she knows life is fragile. She's still learning. She's still discovering what urgency means. SOPHIE: That's what makes it an invitation rather than a prescription. She's not saying her path is the right one for everyone. She's just sharing her story and trusting it'll resonate with whoever needs it. SAM: So what's the one thing you're taking away from this one? SOPHIE: For me it's that urgency isn't about doing more. It's about being fully present for what's already here. And honestly, if you want to go deeper, the whole library is over at 7minutebooks.com/app, with over 6,000 fiction and nonfiction titles you can read or listen to in any language. It starts at $2.99 a month, $9.99 a year, or $19.99 once for lifetime access. SOPHIE: The urgent life isn't something you achieve once. It's something you choose again every single day. We'll see you in the next one.